She Asked For It

Snuggle in with a hot cup of tea or chocolate. It is story time. 

A boy walked down the street, whistling and without a care in the world until he stumbled upon a Bagco Super Sack overflowing with crisp wads of 1000 naira notes. He did a double-take and scanned the street. It was as lonely on a cold desert night. He scratched his head, wondering what to do. In this recession, he would be a fool to walk away from such an amount. At the same time, he wondered if it could be a trap and the owner was stowed away watching who would be greedy enough to help himself to the money. 

Deciding the risk was worth it and that no one would notice if a couple bundles were missing, he stashed them into his pockets and continued on his way. 

Now, comes the question: if this boy is arraigned and charged to court, would he be guilty of stealing?  I can imagine the incredulous look on your faces as you say, “Why, of course yes!”

Well, can’t this be likened to that poor girl who walks down the street and is taken advantage of just because she was dressed ‘indecently’? 

Don’t say that that matter is different. Let’s call a spade, a spade. While, there is a place for decency in every sane society, the lack of it still does not stand as an excuse for raping a girl. Some men, and even surprisingly, women, have the audacity to claim that any girl who wears revealing clothes is asking for it. No one asks to be raped; not even prostitutes. 

In recent times, too many rape occurrences have plagued our society and everyone else acts like they are normal phenomena. Think it’s a lie? See Statistics as at 2015 

Victims of rape should be treated as such- victims, not blamed or stigmatized. More so, if a man truly wants to prove his manliness then it should not be by waylaying a poor girl- rather, that is bestiality!

                                                                                               … Angie Inspired 

Just Saying 

​I pondered for hours about writing this, I thought it was pointless putting my mindless rambling in to coherent words but my mind just wouldn’t shut up so I had no choice.

We’ve all been in a situation where we offend an elder, say ‘sorry’ and get the reply ‘sorry for yourself’. I always hated that answer because I always felt insulted. But today I was in a similar situation and honestly I felt sorry for myself. It wasn’t an insult anymore, it was just stating an obvious truth.

We come to school, pay really cool money and go through some CDC inspired kind of screening just to graduate. I still believe that the craziest thing I’ve ever done and will ever do for money is going to school. 

We spend hours and hours in class trying to understand so many things, half of which you have no business with. Who sets this standards? Your thoughts and ideas do not really count except you back it up with an idea or a quote of some dead men and women who have lived their lives and won’t be allowed to rest in peace.

It is bad enough to fail a course in any class but it is even bad baddo baddest to fail a course in your final year. It feels like your life has come crashing down. Your whole existence begins to dance step up 7 in your eyes. Imagine almost falling down a cliff and being pulled back by something. You feel relieved and shocked. You turn around to see your savior only to come face to face with 2 marks. Just when you think it will pull you back completely from the cliff, it smiles and shakes you a little bit. You start to see your life flash before your eyes. If you are lucky enough, after 20 to 30 more shakes and heart attacks, it gets bored and pulls you up completely. I’m happy for you. But if your village people have held a meeting because of you, that’s when it starts to get bored and feels like you are longer fun. Then it sees its best friend Mr. F dancing in a clearing and believes a reunion is in order. That’s when it finally drops you and you land with your big head. The end.

This might be considered as just mindless rambling or the words of a restless mind but that’s just your opinion. 

We’ve always been made to believe that God tests those He loves. This is very much true but sometimes some events are not testing but should be termed ‘suffering because of something or someone else’s wahala.

That been said, I pray you do not fall down because another person trips over stone.

                                                                                          … Nene Dearest 

Reality 

When I was a little girl I used to read fairytales. In fairytales you meet Prince Charming and he’s everything you ever wanted. In fairytales the bad guy is always easy to spot. The bad guy is always wearing a black cape so you always know who he is. Then you grow up and realize that …..

 Prince Charming is not as easy to find as you thought. You realize that the bad guy is not wearing a black cape and he’s not easy to spot either…. 

Then you are left wondering who they both are… 
                                                                                                       ….Truth

Men Suffer too!!

Yes. We are Girltalk Naija. We are all about women, giving them a voice and championing their cause but we are also about speaking the truth, as it is, no holdbacks. 
From time immemorial women have been victims. They are painted as the ones who bear the brunt all the time. Sad stories begin and end with them and they are always the recipients of pity. 

While it is true that women are generally the ‘weaker’ sex who suffer many travails, there is a resilience about them. Also, in paying so much attention to women, it seems we forget that men are just as human, capable of hurting as well. We also tend to forget that women are at times, the cause of such hurt. 

It is rather unfortunate that we live in such a repressive society. Women are discriminated against and men are told to be men when they are suffering as if being a man is all about acting like an unfeeling robot that excels only at providing for everyone else.

Dear women, men suffer too. Do not, even for a second, think you are the only one who goes through an emotional rollercoaster, being confused about what to make of the raw emotions pounding away in your heart. Men feel hurt sometimes too and you know when it is worse? When it is a woman inflicting the harm. Oh yes! They are big boys who can look after themselves but when it comes to the women they care insanely about, like mothers, sisters, wives and girlfriends they can become a messy puddle of emotions. 

More often than not, this hurt comes from the negative words these important women utter. Straight talk, ladies: what you say can pierce a man’s soul. 

 Thus, you and I must ensure that our men do not also suffer at our hands even if the world throws a curve ball at them.                                                                                                  … Angie Inspired 

Food For Thought

​I AM A WOMAN!!! –  
So what?

I get into an argument with a man,  he slaps me, I feel the pain, yet they tell me I provoked him. I should have been quiet,  I should have been patient.  I should apologize to him. 

I get into an argument with a man,  I slap him,  they tell me I have no respect, no home training. I should have been quiet,  I should have been patient. I should apologize to him. 

Because I am a woman,  I don’t have a right to be angry. So, the degree of my innocence is directly proportional to the degree of my  silence in the face of oppression and brutality…..

Because I am a woman, my husband cheats on me, I am told to tolerate it to save my marriage. The barbaric and stupid excuse is that ”it is in their nature to cheat,  I should slim down,  dress better, cook better,  pray harder and be more pleasant to him”

I cheat, and I am called a whore, I have committed an abomination, I have no right to look elsewhere for the love and emotional support I lack at home,  I am an irresponsible mother.

So I am sent packing, from the home we both built,  with all my earthly possessions stuffed into a tiny box on my head.  I am henceforth forbidden from seeing my two older children,  I’m lucky to be allowed to go with my little one still suckling on my left breast. Three years later, the little one is tagged a bastard. Now, my new name is “after-three”,  because I am a woman.  

He is 28 and runs a company. He’s tagged  wonderful, hardworking,  focused,  career oriented,  successful at a very young age.  

I am 28 and I run a company ” Hmmmm, she is not even married, unserious, can not order her priorities right, a hustler,  loves money,  let her go and get a husband oh”

And I wonder if being successful has anything to do with a person’s gender.

Because I am a woman,

I am not allowed to have wits or be a prodigy, I cannot be financially buoyant,  professionally successful or be treated with respect without a man beside me.

Then I am tagged a generous leg opener, “a runs girl”. They never see the possibility that I actually had to go through ups and downs to get to where I am.

Because I am a woman.

A man looses his wife to death and remarries a year after, he did the right thing, he’s being praised and congratulated for moving on, after all life is for the living. 

A woman looses her husband to death and remarries after 4yrs, “ahhh! so early? Are u sure she wasn’t sleeping with that man even when her husband was alive? That was why she killed her husband.  She’s a witch! ”  Because she’s a woman. 

Because I am a woman, this post will be considered controversial, and everyone will try to correct me.

But don’t forget, that I am a woman and it does not make me less human!!!

          ….. Just sharing an amazing article

Welcome!!!!

​GirlTalk Naija brings together a group of people committed to ensuring that each woman’s voice is heard and that she is given the right platform to prove her worth outside of her looks, beliefs, background or status. 
We are not just people with big phones to upload videos and pictures. We are a movement that has started from the heart of Zaria. We look forward to creating a global network of women doing amazing thing and we shall force the world to look at them with fresh eyes. 
We do this through our YouTube channel, Instagram and Twitter accounts, partnering with worthy organizations and various platforms like Spotlight, Peptalk and Streettalk.
We are about passion, dedication and diligence to helping the girl child!

                                                                            …. Girltalk 9ja